tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31590396584662854392024-02-19T01:28:57.416-05:00Matrimonial and Family Law, Divorce Mediation & Collaborative Law ForumAlla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.comBlogger50125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-46872115415491538732014-08-11T14:30:00.000-04:002014-08-18T14:36:17.373-04:00Is an Uncontested Divorce Right for You?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbg337-lKutahZrY4WJeLQAemOEGpnjc1uv10Jc7wyJjsBxgPM7jP-weFcOCT8qXEFmRA0diX8WmuillS_FMRL4c2F4AHcDFhnstV69VvyKd8nidLiTZ3rcZUVljNFYYMl2GSTnTanYh_e/s1600/crossroads-st-11-231x300.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbg337-lKutahZrY4WJeLQAemOEGpnjc1uv10Jc7wyJjsBxgPM7jP-weFcOCT8qXEFmRA0diX8WmuillS_FMRL4c2F4AHcDFhnstV69VvyKd8nidLiTZ3rcZUVljNFYYMl2GSTnTanYh_e/s1600/crossroads-st-11-231x300.jpg" /></a><br />
<strong style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px;">If you and your spouse have already agreed on:</strong><br />
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<li style="list-style-type: square; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 0px;">How to split up your home and other real estate</li>
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How to divide your retirement assets and business interests</div>
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How to divide your debts</div>
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How you will make decisions for your children, and how you will resolve disagreements in making these decisions</div>
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With whom will the children maintain primary residence</div>
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The parenting schedule during the school year, summers, school breaks and holidays</div>
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The amount and duration of child support and spousal support</div>
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Who will claim the Children on his/her tax return</div>
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What type of additional expenses you will share for the Children and how responsibility for these expenses will be divided</div>
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Who will maintain health insurance for the children, will there be health insurance for each of you?</div>
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<li style="list-style-type: square; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 0px;">you may be able to obtain an Uncontested Divorce.</li>
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<strong>The Process</strong></div>
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To begin an Uncontested Divorce, one spouse is designated the Plaintiff and the other the Defendant. Usually the Plaintiff completes and files most of the paperwork. Click here to <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2014/08/is-an-uncontested-divorce-right-for-you-and-your-spouse/">read more</a>.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-38850166339048657312014-07-11T14:17:00.000-04:002014-08-18T14:37:21.446-04:00Deficient New York Legislation – Same-Sex Marriage<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"><br /></em>
<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"> “It is difficult to make our material condition better by the best law, </em><br />
<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"> but it is easy enough to ruin it by bad laws.” </em><br />
<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"> – Theodore Roosevelt</em><br />
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Sometimes new laws are made for the best of reasons, and yet they end up being flawed. Often legislation is passed in a great rush, and it unfortunately has unexpected or unintended consequences. Here is a case in point.</div>
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New York State did a wonderful thing 3 years ago when it passed The Marriage Equality Act, which allowed same-sex marriages to take place. The new statute not only applied to New York State residents, but permitted couples from other states to come to New York in order to marry. As a result, many same-sex couples from states where same-sex marriage was not allowed took advantage of this statute and were married in New York. The State of New York welcomed them, collected their filing fees and tourist dollars, and received a lot of kudos from the media. All is wonderful, right?</div>
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Click here to <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2014/06/deficient-new-york-legislation-same-sex-marriage/">read more</a>.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-31948264084848004512014-02-25T14:07:00.000-05:002014-08-18T14:38:40.142-04:00Choosing to Adopt? We Can Help!<div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; margin-bottom: 25px; padding: 0px;">
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In today’s world, more and more families, particularly in the United States, are choosing to adopt children. The Law Firm and Mediation Practice of Alla Roytberg, P.C. has recently expanded its practice to include adoptions.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitXLBDGU1n3YrCXnA0nKYd9mjWLlu4LfjiXDG6aNvJJkMqBmnLM7EGfuz2t4AB15m5S45K5Wg6G_E2icDizOtFNBJnGLeB_efIdJSnjRKWQ_Kg3h5jMAPEWg48mK4PM9y14VJkg1jPup7r/s1600/Roytberg-pB-image-Choosing-to-Adopt_We-Can-Help-SKT-Feb-25-2014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitXLBDGU1n3YrCXnA0nKYd9mjWLlu4LfjiXDG6aNvJJkMqBmnLM7EGfuz2t4AB15m5S45K5Wg6G_E2icDizOtFNBJnGLeB_efIdJSnjRKWQ_Kg3h5jMAPEWg48mK4PM9y14VJkg1jPup7r/s1600/Roytberg-pB-image-Choosing-to-Adopt_We-Can-Help-SKT-Feb-25-2014.jpg" height="301" width="320" /></a>For many, the adoption process may seem overwhelming:</div>
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<li style="list-style-type: square; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 0px;">Should you adopt domestically or internationally?</li>
<li style="list-style-type: square; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 0px;">Do you want to formalize the relationship with an existing child in your family through a step-parent adoption?</li>
<li style="list-style-type: square; margin: 0px 0px 0px 30px; padding: 0px;">Are you a same-sex couple trying to decide what types of legal paperwork need to be prepared to secure your rights as parents?</li>
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The process is cumbersome, but not impossible, and we can guide you through it.</div>
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Under New York law, all adoptive parents have to be certified by the court if they want to adopt a child in the United States. Click here to <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2014/02/choosing-to-adopt-we-can-help/">read more</a>.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-86288963960123537892014-02-11T14:02:00.000-05:002014-08-18T14:39:17.757-04:00Innocent Play or Child Pornography?<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"><br /></em>
<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"> “… I know it when I see it.” – Justice Potter Stewart</em><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_TDczCfwHc8rUwTMtEdxFZbrADrfag1ynyaHJEX0BuzFN_IVv_3u0Hr3yA4AScuH_zuDPGJbxZqvaoBojv9Cjw1-aP30WHvPQAnjv0bP2kuzjfG_ZRdVCTlc6BvO67SzQpgFGy3hyphenhyphenHYPB/s1600/Roytberg-pB-image-Innocent-Play-or-Child-Pornography-SKT-Feb-11-2014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_TDczCfwHc8rUwTMtEdxFZbrADrfag1ynyaHJEX0BuzFN_IVv_3u0Hr3yA4AScuH_zuDPGJbxZqvaoBojv9Cjw1-aP30WHvPQAnjv0bP2kuzjfG_ZRdVCTlc6BvO67SzQpgFGy3hyphenhyphenHYPB/s1600/Roytberg-pB-image-Innocent-Play-or-Child-Pornography-SKT-Feb-11-2014.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a>In the December 20, 2013 Law Journal, there is a very interesting case called Matter of <span style="text-decoration: underline;">CW v. CYR</span>. This case comes from Kings County Family Court (Brooklyn Family Court) and it started on November 20, 2013 when the Administration for Children Services (ACS) filed an emergency petition against parents to remove their 4 children. What happened?</div>
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The father lost his Blackberry in April of 2013. The person who picked up the Blackberry found on it pictures of naked children and turned the phone over to the police. The police issued a warrant to search the house and to examine all the computers because allegations were made that the pictures were showing children in sexually explicit poses.</div>
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The District Attorney’s office got involved and then involved the ACS, which removed the children. Fortunately, the children were not removed into foster care because there were family members that were willing to take them, but they were removed from the parents.</div>
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The parents were upset and did not cooperate too well with the ACS, which made the ACS even more angry, so as a result, there was a full fledged lawsuit in Family court which ended up in a hearing. The issue? The ACS alleged that the parents had sexually explicit photos of their children. In addition, the parents refused to bring the kids to their social worker appointments or forensics and would not speak to the case worker.</div>
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Click here to <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2014/02/innocent-play-or-child-pornography/">read more</a>.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-83358259729150492212014-01-17T13:56:00.000-05:002014-08-18T14:42:50.980-04:00Determining Where to File for Divorce in the 21st Century World of Mobile Families<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"> </em><br />
<em style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; text-align: center;"> “Not all those who wander are lost.” – J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring</em><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgthGUi1PSAYxiRVQZzxE5sN7JrWoUUyhNvCjbU5HeL8wWhnJmqPvK1JeDJOleLpF1LIuRsqbXlEttKY_C5biq9JYdihnTpZI2rwVOpdsIpj3Wla_01JjPtWqV0PMXvc6wC5_eUlbbQZr9C/s1600/Roytberg-pB-image-Determining-Where-to-File-for-Divorce-in-the-21st-Century-World-of-Mobile-Families-SKT-Jan-16-2014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgthGUi1PSAYxiRVQZzxE5sN7JrWoUUyhNvCjbU5HeL8wWhnJmqPvK1JeDJOleLpF1LIuRsqbXlEttKY_C5biq9JYdihnTpZI2rwVOpdsIpj3Wla_01JjPtWqV0PMXvc6wC5_eUlbbQZr9C/s1600/Roytberg-pB-image-Determining-Where-to-File-for-Divorce-in-the-21st-Century-World-of-Mobile-Families-SKT-Jan-16-2014.jpg" height="245" width="320" /></a>In the world of mobile families, complex international marriages and overburdened courts, would a New York court accept a divorce case, filed by the husband, an Irish resident, British passport holder and citizen of the European Union against the wife, a U.S. citizen who prefers to reside in Ireland? Apparently, the answer is yes.</div>
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In a recent Putnam County Supreme court case, Mr. S. filed for divorce in New York and his wife opposed it, claiming that New York State had no jurisdiction to end the parties’ marriage. Under New York State law, when you commence an action for divorce, the first thing that needs to happen is that the court needs to verify that there is jurisdiction.</div>
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Click here to <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2014/01/determining-where-to-file-for-divorce-in-the-21st-century-world-of-mobile-families/">read more</a>.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-20336384785332142452013-12-27T13:45:00.000-05:002014-08-18T14:44:23.989-04:00On Undiagnosed Mental Illness and Mediation<div class="post-info" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; margin: -5px 0px 15px;">
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<em>“The best way out is always through.”</em></div>
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– Robert Frost</div>
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What is mental illness? What is mental instability? Scientists and mental health professionals have grappled with questions concerning the human mind for centuries. From artfully crafted screening questions to wires transferring electrodes to images, we live in a society that tries to unravel why some people act in unfathomable ways. Sometimes we feel we are closer to an answer. But the inevitable anomaly continually sets us back.</div>
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In the setting of divorce, we are concerned with identifying an environment that offers an optimal space for a child to flourish. In a litigated process, our system attempts to investigate these environments through forensic evaluations, court ordered investigations into home environments of the parents, supervised visits and other compartmentalized vehicles. One person visits the home of a parent who assumes a requisite, cavalier smile for an afternoon. Another person explores the home of a parent who is absent, balancing two jobs and in no position to tidy. A third person interviews a young child who enthusiastically chatters about the parent who provides more sweets and fewer boundaries. Each of these individuals files a report with the court. Attorneys, equipped only with brief anecdotes told in confidence by their clients and often skewed summaries of opposing party’s positions, advocate for their clients to the best of their abilities. A judge evaluates to the best of his or her ability based on what is presented in court. No one thinks about the gaps that will never be filled.</div>
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There is little opportunity in a courtroom to observe the engagement between divorcing spouses without the filter of their attorneys, coaching them on what words to use and how to temporarily temper their habits by polishing the virtual or real image they present to the world at large. There is little opportunity to emote, to communicate freely, to problem-solve constructively and collectively. And there is certainly little opportunity to flag whether an individual is concerned with love of a child, or an unsavory obsession with simply winning a game.</div>
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It is true that mediation may not be a feasible process for every couple. It is true that a minimal amount of willingness on both sides is imperative to participating effectively. However, mediation is still one of the few forms of dispute resolution in which certain critical human elements can be brought to light. Click here to <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/12/on-undiagnosed-mental-illness-and-mediation/">read more</a></div>
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Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-39106868054707319802013-12-18T13:37:00.000-05:002014-08-18T13:39:07.698-04:00Screening for Domestic Violence<div dir="ltr" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px; margin-bottom: 25px; padding: 0px;">
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Domestic violence transcends racial, cultural, and socioeconomic boundaries and occurs in all types of families. Yet it is frequently unaddressed. According to the <a href="http://www.nyc.gov/html/ocdv/downloads/pdf/2013_Q1_Fact_Sheet.pdf" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">2013 Domestic Violence First Quarter Fact Sheet</a> published by the New York City Mayor’s Office to Combat Domestic Violence, 69 family-related homicides took place in New York City during 2012. 72% of the families involved in those homicides had no prior police contact.</div>
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Most incidents of domestic violence remain unreported, and although it is often difficult to do so, the need to screen clients for domestic violence cannot be overstated. Victims of domestic violence may want to rush through the divorce process as quickly as possible and waive their rights to support and division of assets. A lawyer who is aware of and sensitive to domestic violence concerns can better understand and effectively help his/her client.</div>
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23.4375px;">How does one screen for domestic violence without hurting or offending the person who is being screened? Click here to <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/12/screening-for-domestic-violence/">read more</a>.</strong></div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-8487183838627369802013-10-17T15:36:00.000-04:002013-11-07T15:37:45.730-05:00Do Court Orders Protect from Violence or Can They Potentially Increase its Threat?<div dir="ltr" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23px; margin-bottom: 25px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;">
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<em>“Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.”</em><br /><em>– Ambrose Bierce</em></div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/Roytberg-pB-image-Do-Court-Orders-Protect-from-Violence-SKT-Oct-16-2013.jpg" style="color: #5397b4;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com discusses court orders and their lack of protection against domestic violence." class="alignright wp-image-1503" height="301" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/Roytberg-pB-image-Do-Court-Orders-Protect-from-Violence-SKT-Oct-16-2013.jpg" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 5px; max-width: 100%;" title="Do Court Orders Protect from Violence or Can They Potentially Increase its Threat? " width="322" /></a>Do any of you see disturbing patterns in recent news? Patterns where people who, as it turns out later, have mental health issues, end up snapping and committing murder? These patterns are not limited to our country and unfortunately, they are becoming more and more frequent, especially in the area of family disputes.</div>
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In September 2013, a man kidnapped his small children in Tel Aviv, Israel, and ended up throwing them off an 11-story building, then taking his own life. That man, whose name was Eli Gur was estranged from his wife. After being found “unfit for duty” and released from the police force, Gur lost his mother and was living with his brother in her house. There was a restraining order in place and he could only visit his children under a social worker’s supervision. However, the court order did not prevent him from storming into his wife’s home, choking her, snatching the children and taking off. <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/10/do-court-orders-protect-from-violence-or-can-they-potentially-increase-its-threat/">Click here</a> to read more.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-9883501843399127002013-07-15T15:32:00.000-04:002013-11-07T15:33:39.529-05:00Mediating Secondary Education in NYC<br />
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By Lara Traum (mediator with the Law Firm and Mediation Practice of Alla Roytberg, P.C.)</div>
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<em>“He who opens a school door, closes a prison.”</em><br />― Victor Hugo</div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/07/mediating-secondary-education-in-nyc" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Lara Traum of www.goodlawfirm.com discusses navigating secondary education options in New York City and explains how mediation can help divorcing parents through the decision-making process." class="alignright wp-image-1478" height="383" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Roytberg-pB-image-Mediating-Secondary-Education-in-NYC-SKT-July-15-2013.jpg" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 15px 0px 15px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="Mediating Secondary Education in NYC" width="255" /></a>In a city of unique academic options and restrictions, parental decision-making is perhaps the single most significant force that determines a child’s educational path. Unlike the idyllic American dream that depicts a wholesome Brady bunch in a balanced local high school, successfully stumbling through a system of well meaning and artful instructors, the school system in New York City is varied, inconsistent, competitive, and without guarantee.</div>
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Just as some kindergarteners spend their afternoons with tutors, preparing for admission into elite elementary school programs, many of New York’s seventh graders spend their summers indoors, drilling for the gamble of the specialized high school’s admissions test. <span id="more-1476"></span>As competition becomes more fierce and programs become more rigorous, more and more parents are finding it necessary to adjust their children’s educational plan. <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/07/mediating-secondary-education-in-nyc/">Click here</a> to read more.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-91343347617629139332013-06-20T15:28:00.000-04:002013-11-07T15:31:03.538-05:00Housing Issues for Families – Part 3<h2 dir="ltr" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 30px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.25; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px;">
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The House</h2>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/06/housing-issues-for-families-part-3" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com continues her series on real estate issues during divorce, this time taking on the house." class="alignright wp-image-1467" height="198" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/Roytberg-pB-image-Housing-Issues-for-Families-Part-3-SKT-June-20-2013.jpg" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 10px 10px; max-width: 100%;" title="Housing Issues for Families - Part 3 - The House" width="297" /></a>When people own a house, their proof of ownership is a deed, and very often in a marriage, the deed states that the house is owned by both husband and the wife together. In New York State, this ownership is called <strong>“tenants by the entirety”</strong> and it means that if something happens to one of the spouses the house ownership automatically passes to the surviving spouse.</div>
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Sometimes, if parties divorce and still want to retain the house jointly in the future, they would switch their ownership from being “tenants by the entirety” to becoming <strong>“tenants in common.”</strong> <span id="more-1465"></span>A tenancy in common is a basic type of ownership by partners, where if one of the partners passes away, his or her interest gets transferred to his/her individual heirs rather than to the remaining owner. If owners are not married to each other but want the ownership of the house to pass to surviving owners, they would ordinarily state on the deed that their ownership is as <strong>“joint tenants with right of survivorship.”</strong></div>
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In a separation or divorce, spouses have to explore various options. <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/06/housing-issues-for-families-part-3/">Click here</a> to read more.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-40202152434892221462013-05-14T15:23:00.000-04:002013-11-07T15:26:12.389-05:00Does Honoring Individuality Help Resolve a Dispute?<div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23px; margin-bottom: 25px; padding: 0px;">
By Lara Traum (mediator with the Law Firm and Mediation Practice of Alla Roytberg, P.C.)</div>
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<em>“There are men who can think no deeper than a fact”</em> – Albert Einstein.</div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/05/does-honoring-individuality-help-resolve-a-dispute" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="Lara Traum of www.goodlawfirm.com talks about the importance of maintaining and respecting each partners' individuality when going through a divorce." class="alignright wp-image-1451" height="209" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Roytberg-Traum-pB-image-Does-Honoring-Individuality-Help-Resolve-a-Dispute-SKT-May-14-2013.jpg-.jpg" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="Does Honoring Individuality Help Resolve a Dispute?" width="281" /></a>We live in a world of absolute truths. History, math and science tell us that facts exist, that questions have answers, and that formulas can be applied to resolve many of life’s mysteries. We make firm projections about the future just as we reflect with conviction on the past. We rarely pause to wonder whether the way we experience a situation is indeed that objective – whether the person sitting next to us who has lived on the same block and eaten at the same diner and talked to the same street vendor for the past ten years has experienced the picture entirely differently.</div>
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<span id="more-1447"></span>Vantage point is the depth beyond fact that individuates personhood. But what happens when one identity has been enmeshed with another for years? <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/05/does-honoring-individuality-help-resolve-a-dispute/">Click here</a> to read more.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-82289224974253229672013-04-17T15:20:00.000-04:002013-11-07T15:21:34.906-05:00Housing Issues For Families – Part 2<h1 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 30px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.25; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px;">
Condominiums</h1>
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<em>A man builds a fine house; and now he has a master, and a task for life; he is to furnish, watch, show it, and keep it in repair, the rest of his days.”</em></div>
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<em>Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 – 1882)</em></div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/04/housing-issues-for-families-part-2" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Alla Roytberg explains the unique aspects of condominiums." class="alignright wp-image-1425" height="296" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Roytberg-pB-image-Housing-Issues-For-Families-Part-2-Condominiums-SKT-Apr-16-2013.jpg-.jpg" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="Housing Issues For Families – Part 2 Condominiums" width="198" /></a>A condominium is another type of apartment; however, owning a condominium is very different from “owning” a co-op. In a condominium, owners actually own their space as real estate, as opposed to owning shares in the co-op building. They have a deed, the same way you have a deed on a house. When a person owns a condominium apartment, he/she owns whatever is inside the walls/unit and also a proportionate share of the common elements of the building. For example, if there are 4 apartments in the building, the owner would have a deed for their apartment and a 25% interest in the common elements in the building as well.</div>
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<span id="more-1422"></span>Just like with the co-op, the building has an offering plan. It has a budget and, depending on its size, they may have a management company and it can borrow money, if needed. Monthly maintenance payments in condominiums are usually called “common charges” and they relate to the unit owner’s proportionate share of the costs needed to run the building. <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/04/housing-issues-for-families-part-2/">Click here</a> to read more.</div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-73465305158645770902013-04-10T15:10:00.000-04:002013-11-07T15:13:02.825-05:00Housing Issues For Families – Part 1<h1 dir="ltr" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 30px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.25; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px;">
<span style="line-height: 1.25;">The Co-op</span></h1>
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April 10, 2013</div>
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<em>“A cooperative apartment is an apartment in a building owned and managed by a corporation in which shares are sold, entitling the shareholders to occupy individual units in the building.” – A Definition from Merriam-Webster Dictionary</em></div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/04/housing-issues-for-families-part-1-the-co-op" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com begins her series on housing issues and divorce, discussing cooperative apartments." class="alignright wp-image-1411" height="296" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Roytberg-pB-image-Housing-Issues-For-Families-Part-1-The-Co-op-SKT-Apr-10-2013.jpg-.jpg" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="Housing Issues For Families Part 1 - The Co-op" width="198" /></a>Very often, one of the most critical disputes a family may have revolves around housing. Where will the children reside? Who stays in the marital home? Do they own or rent? If the parties own their home, it may be a condominium, a cooperative apartment (co-op) or a house. How should one structure a delayed sale, exclusive occupancy or a buyout if a family unit is restructured?</div>
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While in other states a co-op is not such a common phenomenon, in New York State, and especially in New York City, a co-op presents a frequent form of ownership for many people. Most pre-war buildings in Manhattan are co-ops and so are many in Queens, Brooklyn and other boroughs. When you own a co-op, you don’t actually own real property. <span id="more-1410"></span>There is no deed, like in a house or a condominium. Instead, your form of ownership consists of a stock certificate that represents the number of shares allocated to your unit by the cooperative corporation, i.e. the building. The co-op has a Board of officers and members. These people make a lot of decisions. If you want to sell your co-op, your purchaser will have to complete an application for Board approval. The Board can approve or deny this application if it believes that the buyer is not financially secure, or, for any other reason at all under the “business judgment rule”. <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/04/housing-issues-for-families-part-1-the-co-op/">Click here</a> to read more. </div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-76211191617213139982013-03-20T15:07:00.000-04:002014-08-18T18:16:33.371-04:00Is Anyone Thinking About the Children?<h1 class="entry-title" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 30px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.25; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px;">
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<em>And the king said: ‘Divide the living child in two, and give half to the one, and half to the other.’ Then spoke the woman whose living child was unto the king, for her heart yearned upon her son, and she said: ‘Oh, my lord, give her the living child, and in no way slay it.’ – The Bible, Kings 3:16-28 – The Story of King Solomon and “Splitting the baby”.</em></div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/03/is-anyone-thinking-about-the-children" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com discusses a tragedy in Delaware where a paternal grandfather killed the mother of his 3 granddaughters. " class="alignright wp-image-1401" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Roytberg-pB-image-Is-Anyone-Thinking-About-the-Children-SKT-Mar-18-2013.jpg" height="297" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="Is Anyone Thinking About the Children?" width="198" /></a>On February 11th, a grandfather shot and killed his grandchildren’s mother in a Delaware Family Court. Christine Belford, a contact lens technician, and David Matusiewicz, an optometrist, were married from 2001 to 2006. As reported by delawareonline.com on February 12th, they had 3 daughters, who were the subject of a custody battle during their divorce. One of the girls is autistic. #childrensrights.<br />
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/03/is-anyone-thinking-about-the-children/">Click here</a> to read more.</div>
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Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-65621325747769996772013-01-17T21:37:00.000-05:002014-08-18T18:17:19.402-04:00Thoughts on the Hague Convention<br />
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<span style="font-weight: normal;">In my last blog, we talked about the U.S. Uniform Child Custody
Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (UCCJEA) and its application on an
international level. The Hague Act can further complicate an already
complex situation. To read the actual text of the Hague Convention of
October 25, 1980 on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction, <a href="http://www.hcch.net/index_en.php?act=conventions.text&cid=24" target="_blank">click here</a>.</span></div>
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In the 21st century, family members often reside in different parts
of the world. What happens if the parties live in one country and one of
the parents just leaves and disappears with the children? <span id="more-1347"></span>Or,
the parties’ relationship is amicable and they are simply trying to
understand which country’s laws should govern their separation and
divorce? <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/01/thoughts-on-the-hague-convention/"> Click here</a> to read more. <u><a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2013/01/thoughts-on-the-hague-convention/"></a></u><br />
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Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-79811746667340708192012-12-20T12:17:00.002-05:002014-08-18T18:18:17.979-04:00The Quagmire of Divorce, International Style<br />
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/12/the-quagmire-of-divorce-international-style" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: initial;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com discusses how complex and expensive an international custody battle can get." class="alignright wp-image-1335" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/Roytbefg-pB-image-The-Quagmire-of-Divorce-International-Style-SKT-Dec-12-2012.jpg" height="239" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="The Quagmire of Divorce, International Style" width="239" /></a><span style="line-height: 1.5625;">Different states in the United States view custody, jurisdiction and enforcement pieces of a divorce differently. Because of that, there is what is called the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (UCCJEA). UCCJEA was drafted in 1997 and was adopted by all States except for Massachusetts and Puerto Rico. Basically, the UCCJEA gives exclusive and continuing jurisdiction for custody cases to the child’s home state.</span></div>
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<span id="more-1334"></span>The child’s home state is generally defined as the state where the child has lived with a parent for six consecutive months before the case was started in court. To read more, please <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/12/the-quagmire-of-divorce-international-style/">click here</a>. </div>
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<br />Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-21669418260798010292012-12-05T12:58:00.002-05:002014-08-18T18:19:16.067-04:00Parenting Within the Radius<br />
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<em>For every thing you have missed, you have gained something else; and for every thing you gain, you lose something” – Ralph Waldo Emerson</em></div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/11/parenting-within-the-radius" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: initial;"><img alt="New York City Mediation Law Attorney Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com discusses the relocation clause and how moving will affect a parenting plan post-divorce. " class="alignright wp-image-1321" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Roytberg-pB-image-Relocation-Clause-SKT-Nov-30-2012.jpg" height="198" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="Parenting Within the Radius" width="251" /></a>Parental relocation post-separation or post-divorce often creates unprecedented challenges for the parent who wants to move, the parent who stays behind, and especially for the children. Most frequently, a dispute arises when the parent with whom the children primarily reside, moves from the residence where they are currently located and far away from “the frequently visiting and involved” parent. For example, if the children’s primary residence is with the mother and the father sees them both during the week and on weekends, what happens if the mother has to move? To read more, please <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/11/parenting-within-the-radius/">click here</a>.<br />
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Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-44362047898402540272012-11-14T14:32:00.001-05:002014-08-18T18:20:18.948-04:00Mediating the Multi-Cultural Fugue of Divorce Mediation<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23px;">Although many of us live in the most multi-cultural State and City in the world, for New York mediators a dispute between participants of unfamiliar cultural, religious and ethnic backgrounds brings unprecedented challenges. In her article on Neuro-Literacy, Pauline Tessler rightly points out that “our clients experience divorce as an extended human transition of operatic dimensions, with emotionally exhausting peaks and valleys involving betrayals, bad faith, and narcissistic wounds that call into question identity, core values, and even the will to survive.”</span><sup style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif;">1</sup><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23px;"> Add to this a mix of centuries’ old beliefs, traditions and rituals, sprinkle it with a committee of advisors, comprised of family, clergy, and community elders, and you get a cacophony of contrasting voices which exacerbate an already looming emotional headache of a human being facing a divorce. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23px;">To read more, please click </span><a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/articles/mediating-the-multi-cultural-fugue-of-divorce-mediation/" style="font-family: 'PT Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 23px;">here</a><br />
<br />Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-87348439932529516512012-10-24T15:34:00.003-04:002014-08-18T18:21:19.710-04:00As a Small Business, Are You Prepared for the Unforeseen?<br />
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/10/as-a-small-business-are-you-prepared-for-the-unforeseen" style="color: #5397b4;"><img alt="Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com discusses how mediation can help with solving unforeseen circumstances in business." class="alignright wp-image-1069" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Roytberg-pB-image-As-a-Small-Business-Are-You-Prepared-for-the-Unforeseen-SKT-Oct-11-2012.jpg" height="174" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="As a Small Business, Are You Prepared for the Unforeseen?" width="261" /></a>A lot of small businesses or partnerships are similar to family. They get together, they’re excited, they start a business. Sometimes the potential partners are friends and sometimes relatives, but they are both excited about their venture. They work hard for many years and then something goes wrong. The question then becomes how does conflict in partnership disputes get addressed?</div>
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<b>TO READ MORE PLEASE CLICK <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/10/as-a-small-business-are-you-prepared-for-the-unforeseen/">HERE</a></b></div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-90858692110518336522012-10-24T15:32:00.001-04:002014-08-18T18:25:47.917-04:00Which Court Do You Go To With a Family Dispute in New York? Part 2<br />
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<strong>Part 2: The Limited Resources Divorce</strong></div>
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<a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/which-court-do-you-go-to-with-a-family-dispute-in-new-york-2" style="color: #5397b4; text-decoration: none;"><img alt="Alla Roytberg of www.goodlawfirm.com discusses supreme court versus family court and which to choose when you have limited resources." class="alignright wp-image-1058" src="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Roytberg-pB-image-family-court-vs-supreme-court-part-2-SKT-Sept-13-2012.jpg" height="205" style="border: none; display: inline; float: right; height: auto; margin: 0px 0px 10px 15px; max-width: 100%;" title="The Limited Resources Divorce" width="309" /></a>As I explained in my last blog, a family where one party is just seeking custody, can go to Family Court. If a person just seeks child support or spousal support, he or she can go to Family Court. If, however, a party is asking for a divorce, that party must file an action for divorce in a Supreme Court. If he or she needs a judge to help divide pensions, assets or liabilities, he or she must file in the Supreme Court as well.</div>
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<b>TO READ MORE PLEASE CLICK <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/09/which-court-do-you-go-to-with-a-family-dispute-in-new-york-2/">HERE</a></b></div>
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-41974186874227777432012-10-24T15:23:00.000-04:002012-10-24T15:23:00.506-04:00Which Court Do You Go to With a Family Dispute in New York?<div dir="ltr" style="font-size: large; text-align: center;">
<strong>Part I: Family Court</strong></div>
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New York State is a little unique because there are 2 different types
of courts that deal with family issues: Family court and the New York
Supreme Court. Though it seems a bit of the opposite, in New York State,
a “Supreme Court” court is actually a lower court and not a higher
appellate court. <br />
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The highest appellate court in New York State is called, the Court of Appeals.<br />
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TO READ MORE PLEASE CLICK <a href="http://www.goodlawfirm.com/attorney/2012/08/which-court-do-you-go-to-with-a-family-dispute-in-new-york/">HERE</a><br />
Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-652640836556286792012-06-24T20:34:00.000-04:002012-06-24T20:34:07.070-04:00How Divorce Saved a Marriage<br />
Oddly, sometimes it takes a divorce action to actually save a marriage and make it better.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIciAY3amIijt0pVY4P-bLd9EMZen5fFWr1ffr_2MyOyqDFcpRsyIFz4Ao1I2qKWqSwkDKf5Twm2U0XIhdWJ_uQsscvm8Jq7lpNzS9Jl9Rw5UwsrlTxAY8q4YX_hz7vQQI3iX2OCYgQ55r/s1600/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+Sometimes+It+Takes+a+Divorce+-+June+24+2012.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIciAY3amIijt0pVY4P-bLd9EMZen5fFWr1ffr_2MyOyqDFcpRsyIFz4Ao1I2qKWqSwkDKf5Twm2U0XIhdWJ_uQsscvm8Jq7lpNzS9Jl9Rw5UwsrlTxAY8q4YX_hz7vQQI3iX2OCYgQ55r/s200/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+Sometimes+It+Takes+a+Divorce+-+June+24+2012.png" style="cursor: move;" width="198" /></a>In one situation, a client came in very distraught. Jane was in a long-term marriage and had 2 lovely children. For years, her husband Bill, was a wonderful soul mate and then, suddenly, he made a 180 degree turn. He took great risks with family money and engaged in affairs with other women. His continuous “highs” and “lows” led Jane to seek help and conclude that he was suffering from a bi-polar disorder. Unfortunately, he refused to seek help. He was not seeing a doctor. He was not taking medication. He thought there was nothing wrong with him and everything wrong with her.<br />
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She did not want to break up the family, nor did she want to leave him, but one cannot knock on a locked door forever. Finally, Jane decided that she needed to file for divorce to preserve the emotional and financial well-being of her family.<br />
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Mediation was out of the question as was collaborative law because Bill simply would not voluntarily participate in any process. He continued to jeopardize the family’s finances, so we had to file an action for divorce in a very aggressive way. In fact, we filed an emergency Order to Show Cause to restrain him from further dissipating family resources. After it was signed by a judge, the Order had to be served on Bill personally, but Bill began evading the process server. He wouldn’t answer the door. He wouldn’t pick up the phone. Finally, the process server caught up with him as he was running down the street with one of his girlfriends, and that is where and how he was finally served.<br />
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Bill then hired a fairly aggressive attorney to defend him and we moved forward. It took months of litigation and financial discovery in court for Bill to finally understand what was happening to his and his family’s life and to realize that he was suffering from an illness. He sought help, and Jane accompanied him on his visits to doctors. After Bill’s condition was stabilized, Jane and Bill decided that they didn’t really want to get divorced, however, Jane still wanted security to make sure that if Bill lost control again, her future and that of their children would not be jeopardized.<br />
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Bill’s “aggressive” lawyer and I were completely on board in helping these people save their marriage. It was finally decided that Bill and Jane would enter into a Separation Agreement that divided all of their finances and their responsibilities with respect to the children. After it was signed by each of them, they would dismiss the divorce action and continue to live together. <br />
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Through therapy, marriage counseling and psychiatric management of Bill’s condition, Jane and Bill were able to stay married and live quite happily for a number of years. Ultimately, after Bill had regained Jane’s trust, they both agreed to destroy the Separation Agreement.<br />
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Jane was wise to act fairly quickly, rather than wait for years as do many spouses of people who are suffering from an addiction or mental illness. When a spouse unilaterally “hangs in there”, despite the other spouse’s refusal to acknowledge their problem, saving the marriage becomes less likely. At that point, the supporting spouse is often simply too tired and resentful to stay in the relationship. Jane and Bill’s story confirms that sometimes one can save a family by taking a drastic step toward its actual dissolution.<br />
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<i>Do you know anyone who would also find this blog of value? Please feel free to forward it to them. If you have any comments or follow-up questions, click on the “Comments” link at the bottom of the blog.</i>
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<br />Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-29616511868215576332012-05-21T14:55:00.000-04:002012-05-21T14:55:19.782-04:00Is It “Culture Versus Law”?<h2><b>Learning about Cultural Sensitivity in Family Disputes</b></h2>
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<span style="color: #3a8567;"> “<i>The wise man belongs to all countries, for the home of a great soul is the whole world.</i>” - Democritus</span></div>
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Whether it is mediation, litigation or otherwise, sensitivity to cultural differences is very important.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3AyCiQdagKzM50-6Q6OrKCQJnXBiFS3mZHACH86S0TkatNpisex7OEAigC6HXR0ppfWMRFqazSn1NpA9CG-GnClCfGzAv6b6LNPzwN2fPmDCPsOtMkicCxyhN3w1gxpgb45gD6peX2YF8/s1600/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+Cultural+Sensitivity+-+May+19+2012.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3AyCiQdagKzM50-6Q6OrKCQJnXBiFS3mZHACH86S0TkatNpisex7OEAigC6HXR0ppfWMRFqazSn1NpA9CG-GnClCfGzAv6b6LNPzwN2fPmDCPsOtMkicCxyhN3w1gxpgb45gD6peX2YF8/s320/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+Cultural+Sensitivity+-+May+19+2012.png" width="250" /></a></div>
One of my main offices is in Forest Hills, which is located in Queens, one of the boroughs of New York City. Queens is the most ethnically diverse county in New York State. Families of all backgrounds, languages and faiths from all over the world arrive and make their homes in tightly knit Queens communities - Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Haitian, Indian, Bukharian, Italian, Hispanic, African, Russian, Iranian, Hindu, Moslem, Greek Orthodox, Catholic, Jewish, Buddhist, Bahai.... just to name a few.<br />
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Perhaps because of my office’s location or the fact that I spent more than 20 years advising diverse clients on family issues, I have developed a niche practice in helping people honor their cultural heritage as they address disputes against the backdrop of a 21st Century United States’ legal system. While representing culturally diverse clients in court requires a degree of knowledge and cultural sensitivity, acting as a neutral mediator often presents even a greater challenge, - to maintain a delicate balance between honoring the cultural and religious rules and rituals that a family has held sacred for hundreds if not thousands of years and, on the other hand, helping people understand U.S. law and come up with agreements that are considered fair and legally enforceable under our modern civil system.<br />
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Let us take, for example, a divorce mediation in a Hindu or a Bukharian family. The Hindus are primarily from India and the Bukharians are Jews from a Moslem country of Uzbekistan (formerly part of the Soviet Union). Religious and cultural practices are vastly different. However, both cultures are characterized by very tightly knit family structures and centuries’ old history of how disputes get resolved in their communities.<br />
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In a typical American divorce mediation, two spouses address their needs and interests with a neutral mediator, who facilitates the conversation, provides neutral legal information and helps them reach an agreement on each important item that needs to be addressed in a separation or a divorce. In that structure there is an assumption that each spouse is, at least, able to articulate what he or she needs or wants in order to move forward.<br />
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But what if that assumption is incorrect? What if a 45 year old woman from India is unable to articulate her needs and interests without consulting with her older brother, who has been her advisor in all financial matters even after her marriage? What if a 43 year old Bukharian man is unable to decide or even discuss what type of post-separation parenting time he would want with his children without the involvement of his parents, or sometimes, even his grandparents? A mediator would be unable to help the parties move forward in their dispute without understanding, first of all, who are the important advisors in their lives, and secondly, whether these people may need to be more directly involved and even present in the mediation process. And what if these people end up in court? Clearly, the judge will not devote any time to understanding cultural issues and helping them design a unique solution that addresses their concerns! He or she will simply apply the law, with which, even after a trial, a party may not comply if it contrasts with his system of centuries’ old beliefs. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG8eigchcigVn4lh7iuSovvaIoDjvGFMGB86JW7NgKWEoWSBFES6APWDL8p8lSf9yDEyCQBTzSpwoQ-vYAo-8C11H9Y8oSZK9yuUqf-U3eftNYFnB5K4fe3wzFwFZXAba57S4xj5Q8WPC2/s1600/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image+-+Cultural+Sensitivity+-+May+19+2012.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG8eigchcigVn4lh7iuSovvaIoDjvGFMGB86JW7NgKWEoWSBFES6APWDL8p8lSf9yDEyCQBTzSpwoQ-vYAo-8C11H9Y8oSZK9yuUqf-U3eftNYFnB5K4fe3wzFwFZXAba57S4xj5Q8WPC2/s320/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image+-+Cultural+Sensitivity+-+May+19+2012.png" width="250" /></a>Some beliefs can withstand time. But what about those that are contrary to our society’s laws? How does one deal with an Iranian man who has several wives, or a Bhutanese man who feels entitled to marry a second wife, because the first wife did not “give” him sons? Or a Sicilian father who hits his teenage son after the son announces that he is gay? If we simply apply our laws, these people would probably end up in jail and feel that they have been grievously wronged by “the system”... Would arresting them enlighten them? I would tend to doubt it and suggest that in these cases “culturally sensitive” mediation may ultimately yield a better result.<br />
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Of course, mediating these cases is often tricky. It is imperative to watch for culturally induced power imbalances and be wary of prior “signed” agreements or quick settlement agreements between the parties, since they could have been obtained under duress.<br />
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In addition, what about first generation Americans in these communities? It is incredibly challenging for them, their parents, their clergy and community leaders to balance the values of modern New York and the old country. Will they be able to transform, blend in and function within our system, without completely losing the treasured beliefs of their ancestors?<br />
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In the United States, many parents and their adult children do not reside in the same neighborhoods. The parents do not get involved in their adult children’s or in their grandchildren’s lives. In contrast, in immigrant communities, the aging parents continue to play a vital role throughout the lives of their children and grandchildren. As they get older, they also receive full support from their family. Their wisdom is respected by the youth, and they are often consulted and advise on important events and topics. Their lives are enriched and so are the lives of the younger generation that resides with them.<br />
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This cultural heritage is a blessing that should be reconciled with but not lost in our modern world.<br />
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<i>Do you know anyone who would also find this blog of value? Please feel free to forward it to them. If you have any comments or follow-up questions, click on the “Comments” link at the bottom of the blog.</i>
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<br />Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-36101993312105659222012-04-30T20:02:00.001-04:002012-05-21T14:56:59.415-04:00The No-Divorce Clause<p> </p>
<span style="color: #3a8567;"><i>“Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go.”</i> - Heman Hesse</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT3AVSvXp5323YNWb6TMjiDlThTyifMGVIqfUl7HnKjHQFV04LxxfMIvLdCyKluiOAWXJXIpFOKvh_xyoHCU4evg3vzo58UM4VVUxfcut4vBvZrMz2GM9cgGazDceDNxG45kRGj0t9KSdU/s1600/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+No+Divorce+Clause+-+Apr+29+2012.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img align="right" border="0" height="176" width="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT3AVSvXp5323YNWb6TMjiDlThTyifMGVIqfUl7HnKjHQFV04LxxfMIvLdCyKluiOAWXJXIpFOKvh_xyoHCU4evg3vzo58UM4VVUxfcut4vBvZrMz2GM9cgGazDceDNxG45kRGj0t9KSdU/s200/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+No+Divorce+Clause+-+Apr+29+2012.png" width="200" /></a>In many hotly contested matrimonial actions, one of the parties delays agreeing to a divorce for fear that the other side will refuse to abide by his/her financial obligations a minute after the divorce is granted. Such was the case discussed in a recent New York Law Journal article, entitled “Judge Voids Pact Blocking Divorce Until Home is Sold.”<br />
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In that action, the couple was married for nearly 20 years and have an adult child. In 2008 they signed a Separation Agreement that contained the following provision, “neither party shall file any papers to obtain a judgment of divorce in court until the apartment is sold.” The couple’s marital residence was a Manhattan apartment, which, after the Separation, was occupied by the husband and has been on the market for sale since 2008 for over 3 million dollars. Neither party had the funds to buy the other’s interest and retain the apartment, which is why in 2008 they decided that it had to be sold. At this point, 4 years later, the parties are still married, the apartment has not been sold and the husband continues to reside in the apartment with his girlfriend and their 3 year old son.<br />
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The husband argued that the provision that blocked the parties from getting divorced until after the sale should be vacated, because the wife was abusing it to demand an inflated price and force him to stay married. The wife, who is struggling financially, claimed that the sale was a condition precedent to the divorce and that if divorce were granted without it, the husband would have no incentive to sell the apartment at all, depriving her of her share of the proceeds. She pointed to her agreement to waive spousal maintenance in consideration of receiving the money from the sale of the Manhattan apartment. In her view, the husband has been deriving a huge benefit from living in a luxury apartment, which has no mortgage, together with his new family at her expense.<br />
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Nevertheless, upon hearing the case, Supreme Court Justice Matthew Cooper said that the clause was not enforceable and so cleared the way for the husband to proceed with his divorce action, despite the fact that the apartment was not yet sold. Judge Cooper said that instead of fully moving on with their lives, the parties tried to lay blame on each other for their apartment languishing on the real estate market. However, as a matter of public policy, he said that whatever the reason for the inertia of the real estate sale process, the “no divorce clause” was responsible for indefinitely delaying the parties’ divorce and was against public policy, which, over the last years and decades, has been to make divorce progressively easier to obtain in New York State.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPX4il7nUW-496pzk1WsT1ina7PmRkuAXHCB7tLOgnc-JGkZOtfHgxjWg9yUDaSl7mK1EGgBY-_epM27UnJx1AjU18FrmotWJF9w3-oeqt1T0AGc-lG2WN-vpwM958w44bnjN5UHwNe-Xe/s1600/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image+-+No+Divorce+Clause+-+Apr+29+2012.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="81" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPX4il7nUW-496pzk1WsT1ina7PmRkuAXHCB7tLOgnc-JGkZOtfHgxjWg9yUDaSl7mK1EGgBY-_epM27UnJx1AjU18FrmotWJF9w3-oeqt1T0AGc-lG2WN-vpwM958w44bnjN5UHwNe-Xe/s320/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image+-+No+Divorce+Clause+-+Apr+29+2012.png" width="100" /></a><b>The Takeaway:</b> Do not insert clauses that delay or prevent the divorce until completion of a certain financial requirement in a Separation Agreement, - courts may consider them contrary to public policy. Each party must comply with the financial requirements imposed upon him/her by the Settlement Agreement. However, failure to do so, will not prevent him/her from getting a divorce.
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<br />Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3159039658466285439.post-87568557319459609032012-04-16T17:46:00.001-04:002012-04-16T18:00:30.610-04:00Mandatory Health Insurance and the Ninth Amendment <br />
<p style="color: #3a8567;"><i>“A wise and frugal Government, which shall restrain men from injuring one another, which shall leave them otherwise free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned. This is the sum of good government...” </i>- Thomas Jefferson. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQIr8ymAeQl9q_UiiTTPzARDD1v-4930x-acgYMUhyQMOkoY5AyVVLiolYycJVher6LQp_I69aj9W2tC36cWvYB9i9kVRNKyYL24g9ja1spFEvwOio8n9zdGwbsGPBRD6jeFY26Kb00dks/s1600/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image+-+9th+Amendment+-+Apr+16+2012.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear:right; float:right; margin-left:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="254" width="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQIr8ymAeQl9q_UiiTTPzARDD1v-4930x-acgYMUhyQMOkoY5AyVVLiolYycJVher6LQp_I69aj9W2tC36cWvYB9i9kVRNKyYL24g9ja1spFEvwOio8n9zdGwbsGPBRD6jeFY26Kb00dks/s320/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image+-+9th+Amendment+-+Apr+16+2012.png" /></a></div><br />
Last month, the Supreme Court of the United States devoted 3 days of oral arguments to the question of mandatory health care. One of the most controversial aspects of the new law, the Individual Mandate will allow the federal government to require nearly all Americans to obtain health insurance. The opponents have often relied on the Ninth Amendment to the Constitution, as the basis to argue against expansion of Federal Government. One of them, a Georgetown law school professor, Randy Barnett, a passionate Libertarian, has been the main intellectual force behind the challenge to the Individual Mandate in the national health care laws. <br />
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So what is this Ninth Amendment? The Ninth Amendment is a part of the Bill of Rights and it reads:<br />
<p style="padding-left:30px; padding-right:30px;">“The enumeration in the Constitution of certain rights shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.”</p>Basically, it says that the fact that there are certain rights and powers listed in the Constitution is all fine and good, but whatever is not specifically listed is still “retained” by “the people”. Consequently , there may be a presumption that people have certain rights and liberties, which are in addition to those specifically listed, and while the Framers may have thought of some, they probably did not think of all of them, so whatever they didn’t think of is still there and is “retained by the people”.<br />
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Over the years professor Barnett has developed a Ninth Amendment speciality. It is a favorite of the Libertarians, who use it to defend economic freedom and argue in favor of limiting government. When the US Constitution was signed on September 17, 1787 and then was sent to the states for ratification, there were two factions: The Anti-Federalists who didn’t want the Federal Government to have power and the Federalists who felt it was important for there to be centralized government to a certain extent.<br />
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The Anti-Federalists argued that the Bill of Rights should be added to the Constitution and the Federalists argued against it on the basis that it would make unclear who was “in charge” of those rights which are not named in the Bill of Rights. In 1788, the Virginia ratifying convention tried to solve that problem by proposing language that would say that clauses which declare that Congress shall not exercise certain powers should not be interpreted to extend the powers of the Congress by implication. They proposed language that would secure the States and individuals in their belief that unless there was a specific power that was given to the Federal Government, the Federal government didn’t have additional unstated power. Nothing in the Constitution should be used to extend the power of the government.<br />
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In 1789, the debate continued and the Ninth Amendment was brought to the House of Representatives. James Madison and Alexander Hamilton were involved, and the ultimate result was the “great residuum” statement. While the powers of the general government are circumscribed and directed to objects, according to James Madison, there was still a danger that government would have discretionary powers which may be abused. He said that the Ninth Amendment was critical because it addresses a "great residuum" of rights that have not been "thrown into the hands of the government." <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPObmzanVIFaGhuRqE9gcCpUPS-ketG9WLPvYUo5BUauuSydHFxG2akZK1qWJrMQWGX27uhxKwZEXatKmxse2lT8uEu9THcdQZ9xoeTf4mlDT7hTa3bXIEXBk1EgtZ18KlkOsW7tRmYwiK/s1600/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+9th+Amendment+-+Apr+16+2012.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="175" width="326" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPObmzanVIFaGhuRqE9gcCpUPS-ketG9WLPvYUo5BUauuSydHFxG2akZK1qWJrMQWGX27uhxKwZEXatKmxse2lT8uEu9THcdQZ9xoeTf4mlDT7hTa3bXIEXBk1EgtZ18KlkOsW7tRmYwiK/s320/Roytberg+-+pB+-+Image2+-+9th+Amendment+-+Apr+16+2012.png" /></a></div>Remember, the US version of democracy was still a fairly new phenomenon. In France, revolution was in full swing, its government swiftly moving into a distinctly different direction in anticipation of the upcoming Terror years. The United States was unique in its “moderation” of power by the government. The Ninth Amendment ultimately became part of the Constitution on December 15, 1791 upon ratification by three-fourths of the states.<br />
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Professor Barnett and other opponents of the proposed health care law say that the Ninth Amendment requires a presumption of liberty and implies that the government cannot force people to pay for or purchase insurance. Whether or not he is able to persuade the Supreme Court remains to be seen.<br />
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Alla Roytberg, Esq.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14487013767061747413noreply@blogger.com0